One Is The Loneliest Number

Little Miss is just about seventeen months old.  For months now, people have asked me if I am ready for another.  The simple answer is no.  I am not ready for another.  I love my sweet girl, but would I really be able to handle a second child?  I am surprised at how much patience I have developed since becoming a mother, but I am not sure I would be able to stay sane.  I'm just being honest.  But let's be real, having another is ALWAYS a possibility but not something I am actively pursuing. 

This brings me to question why it's often viewed as a negative to have an only child.  I was an only child until I was about 6 and I thought I had it pretty good.  I had plenty of cousins my age to play with and was with them frequently.  I had one on one attention from both of my parents, I did well in school and I was read to.  I had undivided attention, and isn't that important when it comes to raising children?  Whenever I am asked if I am going to have another and I say I'm not sure, possibly just the one, I get weird looks like I have ten heads.  Why is it always expected that there will be more than one child? 

Now I am by no means coming down on people who have more than one child.  I think children are wonderful.  I enjoyed my pregnancy and the whole act of labor and I would do it all over again in a heartbeat.  I still can't help but think about all of the things I will be able to provide to one child rather than two, or even three. 

I think about future endeavors.  What if my kids go to college?  One child is doable, but two?  What if they can't get financial aid?  How will I pay for all of this? 

I think about my current situation with my husband travelling for work.  Would I be able to handle two children without his help and support?  How will our relationship be affected if we have more than one child? 

I don't think about having another child as providing a playmate to my daughter.  I think about creating a life, a being, who needs love and attention and to be taken care of.  As a parent, I want to give my child everything possible and I truly mean that.  If I do have another, then it is meant to be.  Until then, I'll focus on what I can do for my one child and do the best I can. 

Any thoughts on this?  Anyone out there an only child that would like to add insight?  I welcome all thoughts and comments!